Geek Tunes

By Roz Young

Confession time, my internet friends. I bought an Adele album, 21. Now, it’s true that I’m going through some stuff this year, but that’s not why I occasionally put some of her songs on repeat. It’s because I’m writing geeky lyrics in my head. And they are AWESOME.

You might not be familiar with Adele’s record but I’m sure you’ve heard a lot of these songs play on the radio. Or in Second Cup. Or Starbucks. And I think Chapters only has this one album that just plays on repeat, over and over until people go crazy and buy all the books just to get the hell out of there before the piano starts again. She’s got great pipes, the tracks are pop catchy but with a soul vibe, and who doesn’t love a sweet breakup record? Matt. That’s who. So I do this geek lyric writing when he’s not in the car.

Just for some examples, the first track is “Rolling in the Deep” but I sing “Rolling in Helm’s Deep”. I think they could have used Adele there on the front lines, she’s feisty.

I’m also sorry to do this to you, but from now on, every time you hear “Rumor Has It” you will be singing my version, “Boomer Has It” about Battlestar Galactica’s favourite Cylon. Oh yeah, spoiler alert.

My next favourite song is “Set Fire to the Rain” which I’ve adapted to be about a World of Warcraft fire mage. They could literally set fire to the rain, and watch the ex-boyfriend’s face burn. That’s how you get back at an old flame. WITH ACTUAL FLAME. I think it’s what Adele really meant too. She’s probably a blood elf, I think they like fake lashes.

Lastly, I leave with you with my masterpiece, “Someone Dead Too” which I’ve shaped into an epic zombie love story. With lines like “I hate to turn up out of the gloom unexpired” and “You know how the time flies, only yesterday I was still alive,” it’s gold. Coming soon, the video? I wish!